Define “smelly cookie.”

The Girl Scouts have recalled their Lemon Chalet Cremes because — though they’re safe to consume — they taste and smell funny.

Insert joke here.

And thanks, Bro. Jay, for the link.

iPhones have an app for everything, don’t they?

Including one for cheating spouses — where a text remains for only so long and then disappears like last year’s roses.

It’s called the TigerText, and if you can’t abide the snarky tone of the Time article, try reading about it here. Except that’s snotty, too. Try here, then. Nope, the golf great and cheating husband is not going to catch a break here. Jaysus.

Come Purim, can a little boy dress as Queen Esther?

When Jewish children dress up to celebrate Purim, is it any big deal if a little boy asks to be Queen Esther? The star of the show?

Here’s more on Purim. Dang. I wish we had something like this.

Jail ‘em all and let God sort ‘em out.

I believe I have found my new favorite headline.

That, or my needle’s stuck.

Bro. Jay sends us this, a story about a bill before Utah legislators that would jail business owners who employ undocumented immigrants. And here’s a bit more on E-Verify.

Filed your taxes yet?

Me, either. I like to run with the crowd. When everyone else has filed their taxes, I shall do so, too.

Go ahead, Rep. Louise Slaughter!

Listen to her talk about domestic violence as a pre-existing condition.

More on Rep. Slaughter here. More on her remarks here.

Come let us pray for Sen. Bunning

If there ever was a family values issue, extending unemployment benefits is it, says Sen. Dick Durbin (D-Illinois). Others agree — from both sides of the political aisle.

Standing alone, Sen. Jim Bunning (R-Outer Colony) disagrees. And then he cusses. Bless his heart.

If tea is not to your liking…

…try coffee.

Join the Coffee Party Movement. You can learn more here, on Facebook.

And thanks, Jay, for the link.

To all pain-in-the-ass moms, everywhere

Joannie Rochette, the emotional favorite for an Olympic medal in Vancouver, won the bronze in women’s figure skating last night, just days after the sudden death of her mother, Therese – her biggest fan and harshest critic — of a heart attack.

After her win, Rochette spoke publicly for the first time about her mother and her loss. Of her decision to skate so soon after her mother’s death, she said this:

That was the way that mom raised me, to be faithful to the person that she made of me, to make her proud.

and then she added this:

And even though she’s not here anymore, I’m not afraid to say that sometimes she was a pain in the ass.

I just love that, and hope my own children will call me that upon my death, too. You can read more here and here and here.

Keep your Bedazzling hands offa my nu-nus

File this under “You canNOT make this up:”

You can have lil’ jewels attached to your ladybusiness, because God knows God didn’t make your ladybusiness nearly beautiful enough.

How long, oh Lord, how long? Why does this nonsense always get pitched to women. And when – and I say this with love — will men start worrying that their down-yonders aren’t covered in jewels, and don’t smell like oranges (rain, patchouli, you name it), and when will men start purchasing products to change all that, do you think?

And thanks, Pursuit of Harpyness, for the link.

UPDATE: Oh, Lord. I just read that Jennifer Love Hewitt uses this product, or something like it. And there’s a video. (Not to worry: It’s not of the actual bejeweling.) Jennifer! Whatever are you thinking?!?