I’m sure I have a spare $30 or so somewhere around here…

…if you will add to it, and you and you, maybe we can raise $1 million to buy J.D. Salinger’s toilet.

Unless, of course, you aren’t a Salinger fan, in which case you can just send a nickel.

And thanks, Bro. Jay, for the link — mostly so I could post a photo of a toilet on this blog. That’s got to be some kind of milestone.

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32 Responses to I’m sure I have a spare $30 or so somewhere around here…

  1. Okay. A million bucks (asked) for a used toilet on which a famous ass, or rather the ass of a famous writer, sat. What were you saying about “you can’t make this stuff up?”
    I promise, if I win tonight’s PowerBall, I will not buy this toilet. I saw a really good one at The Home Depot for under $200.

    • If you win tonight’s PowerBall, can you build my patio out back? Work seems to have stopped, given the lack of money and stuff.

      • That’s IT? Not take over mortgage payments ‘n’ stuff?

        • Nah. Just a patio. My needs/wants are simple. They’re actually not, but I figured I’d ask for something small, then slip in the Big Stuff later.

          Crap. Now I’ve blown my own cover.

  2. Well, considering how much I owe you, we can negotiate.

  3. So because he stopped writing books, we’re supposed to think that his creative productivity went, er, elsewhere?

  4. So I’m thinking about owning famous people’s belongings — do I have any / much desire to do so? I guess not unless it’s something I would want regardless of the previous owner anyway.

    • I wouldn’t mind having Harry S. Truman’s signature on a piece of paper. My aunt has his signature framed and hanging in her front hallway. I think that’s kind of cool, though I probably wouldn’t pay a lot for it.

    • If you think about it, there’s something vaguely metaphysical about it, as if the object were imbued with the spirit of the person who owned it, and now you the new owner have part of that, too. As if, if someone sat on J.D. Salinger’s toilet long enough, maybe he would produce the next “Catcher In the Rye.

      The Orthodox are very big on relics. You can purchase a little pillow-like object that purports to have a teeny-tiny sliver of a bone of St. ___{fill in the blank}___. It’s the same principle.

      • I guess that makes some kind of sense.

      • “if someone sat on J.D. Salinger’s toilet long enough, maybe he would produce the next Catcher In the Rye.”

        I could buy that concept if it was his desk! Otherwise it seems that would work only if Salinger actually wrote sitting on the toilet. If not, I think the new owner can probably be assured of producing “works” of similar quality to J.D.’s whilst enjoying the author’s commode.

        • Maybe he did write sitting on the toilet. I know someone who takes his laptop into the bathroom. I know. Too much information.

  5. KIND OF OFF-TOPIC, but the thought about several people kicking in to achieve a goal reminds me of a performer I sort-of know. She’s been diagnosed with a kind of cancer, and while she does have medical coverage (she’s in a union), she’ll be out of work for quite some time. So she’s asked 1000 people to contribute $50 apiece, which will keep her going for a long time. I guess if performers get contributions to make an album, they can also get contributions to not go bankrupt.

  6. Ah but I see that you have to go to her blog for the details:
    http://fellow-travelers-advisory.blogspot.com/

  7. I already sent my spare $ to Pakistan. Had I known about this earlier….I would have sent my spare $ to Pakistan.

  8. Holden Caulfield

    I am good for a donation…but I call dibbs on the first night that we all collectively own J.D.’s john!

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