Comes now one Sylvia Ann Driskell v. Homosexuals

Sixty-six year old Sylvia Ann Driskell has filed a federal lawsuit, as an ambassador of God and Jesus Christ, against Homosexuals (printed just like that in her own hand), in an attempt to convince the rest of us that homosexuality is a sin.

You can read Ms. Driskell’s case here. It is quite involved and Ms. Driskell has taken no small amount of time on it. Ms. Driskell will be representing herself. Most likely, both God and Jesus, for whom she purports to speak, will be otherwise involved in issues such as war, hunger, and poverty.

And forthwith, we can only wish for Ms. Driskell another activity into which she can pour her entire being.

Published by datingjesus

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7 Comments

  1. Odd. I didn’t think federal courts accepted filings handwritten in cursive script. I thought it had to printed…or typed.

    And then there’s the issue of jurisdiction. I don’t think federal courts have jurisdiction over sin. Since there’s been no sodomy laws on the books in Nebraska since 1978, I’m not sure exactly where the poor dear could redress the issue. As the authorities she cites have already defined homosexuality as sin, there’s no relief to be found there. (And…I may have missed it…but I don’t see in her pleading any actual call for relief.)

    Then there’s the issue of damages. (Let’s not get into standing.) As representing God, who, by His own admission, caused all this sin to come about, how can damages to an all-seeing, all-knowing, all-powerful God be quantified?

    1. I think the last time anything approaching the federal courts had jurisdiction over sin, we were still using stocks in the public square, as punishment.

    1. Phew. THAT’s a relief. I was trying to figure out how she was going to collect damages.

      1. Door to door! “Hello, are you a sinful homosexual? Yes? You owe me big time for what you’ve done to my life and the life of my country. We’re all going to burn because of you.

        1. Makes sense! That’s a GREAT way to collect. I know when I knocked doors for Jesus back in the day, I was super-successful with just that approach!

    2. So…what the federal court said is God needs a better lawyer.
      Makes sense to me.

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