Category Archives: Girl stuff

Are women’s rights really human rights?

womens-voteCome to a Salon at Stowe at 5 p.m. this Thursday at the Harriet Beecher Stowe Center at 77 Forest St. in Hartford. I’ll be there, as will be:

Carolyn M. Treiss, executive director of Connecticut’s Permanent Commission on the Status of Women
Kyle Turner, student at University of Hartford

C’mon. There’s food. There’s conversation. What more could you want?

For reservations to this free event, contact or call 860-522-9258, x317. Hope to see you there.

Ashley Judd is my shero

ashley-judd-senateRead this essay she wrote on online harassment and bullying. It includes:

During a conference championship game on Sunday, I posted a comment to Twitter that some found unsportsmanlike. I didn’t much care for three players bleeding on the court, and I tweeted that the opponent was “playing dirty & can kiss my team’s free throw making a—.” The volume of hatred that exploded at me in response was staggering.

I routinely cope with tweets that sexualize, objectify, insult, degrade and even physically threaten me. I have already — recently, in fact — looked into what is legally actionable in light of such abuse, and have supplied Twitter with scores of reports about the horrifying content on its platform. But this particular tsunami of gender-based violence and misogyny flooding my Twitter feed was overwhelming.

Tweets rolled in, calling me a cunt, a whore or a bitch, or telling me to suck a two-inch dick. Some even threatened rape, or “anal anal anal.”

And thanks, Cynical, for the link.

Stop it, Lego, and stop it now.

lego_beauty_tipsCheck out Emma’s Beauty Tips from Lego.

Why-oh-why would a 5- to 12-year old need beauty tips?

A great suggestion for a new Legos toy: The Women of the Supreme Court it’s awesome, that’s why.

Consent for Dummies

Rockstar Dinosaur Pirate Princess explains it all for you, what precisely means no. She writes:

…it seems people really have a problem understanding that before you have sex with someone, and that’s every time you have sex with them, make sure they want to have sex with you. This goes for men, women, everyone. Whoever you are initiating sexytimes with, just make sure they are actually genuinely up for it. That’s it. It’s not hard. Really.

If you’re still struggling, just imagine instead of initiating sex, you’re making them a cup of tea.

You say “hey, would you like a cup of tea?” and they go “omg fuck yes, I would fucking LOVE a cup of tea! Thank you!*” then you know they want a cup of tea.

If you say “hey, would you like a cup of tea?” and they um and ahh and say, “I’m not really sure…” then you can make them a cup of tea or not, but be aware that they might not drink it, and if they don’t drink it then – this is the important bit –  don’t make them drink it. You can’t blame them for you going to the effort of making the tea on the off-chance they wanted it; you just have to deal with them not drinking it. Just because you made it doesn’t mean you are entitled to watch them drink it.

But do click on the link. It’s priceless.

Knowing the rules, and not caring

1*4j5yGlQEIJaynPbCnRCipgLois sends this, an awesome essay about getting older (as a woman) and flouting the rules — of fashion, of just about everything else. (What you can’t see in the photo at right is the cutline: “Bitch face and ton of liner. I regret nothing.”

A sample, from Shannon Barber:

To the horror of the woman I was speaking to, I was in fact fully aware that my over the knee boots and very tight pants accentuated my large thighs.

A very helpful woman maybe my age or a bit older whispered to me in the grocery store that my outfit might have been more flattering if I wore a tunic or long jacket. As it was my hip length cardigan combined with the boots and tight pants fully exposed my terrible secret.

I have big meaty thighs. The thing that brought on the horror was that I responded to the fashion advice with a smile and the declaration that I liked my outfit and had done it on purpose.

Here are all the things women could buy if there wasn’t a gender pay gap

pay_infographic_annualFrom the Washington Post and linked to a graphic from the Center for American Progress. Then, too, the figures are from 2010. Wonder what a difference five years makes.